Shí­ or 10

Ten things I love about Natalie. Numbers are also in Mandarin because I need to practice.


1 yī -- She always tries new things, even if she is a little scared at first. She is our only child that has ate the octopus.

2 èr -- She can be both a tomboy and a girly girl and knows it's okay to be anything you want.

3 sān -- She burps better than my boys!

4 sì -- She is very loving and giving and is willing to help whenever needed.

5 wǔ -- She has a great smile, and pout too.

6 liù -- She's funny without even trying.

7 qī -- She will make friends with anyone anywhere!

8 bā --She learns things very quickly. She may drag her feet at first but when she decides to do it she does it with a full heart! And she succeeds.

9 jiǔ -- She is very artistic. She loves taking pictures, making movies, styling clothes, drawing pictures, making books, dancing, singing, if it's artsy she likes it.

10 shí­ -- She has the most tender heart and is always aware of other people's feelings and will sometimes put her feelings to the side to make someone else happier. Sometimes it hurts her to do this but she does. She continually practices kindness even if I think that person may not deserve it. Again, She's still teaching me things.

Reasons

My daughter Natalie turns 10 this week. She is wonderful and she is trying. I love her with all my heart and can't imagine my life without her even when she is in the midst of a tantrum and I'm trying not to pull all my hair out.

She is my biggest reminder that all things happen in time. That there are reasons why things don't always work out in  my time but in God's time. Here's why...

Way back in 1998 we decided we wanted to try and have another baby. We got pregnant so easily and accidentally with Greyson so of course I figured it would be easy. How wrong I was.....

Month after month and nothing! Our lives starting being lived in 2 weeks increments. 2 weeks for ovulation, 2 weeks to see if it "worked". I became a little obssessed. It was not fun. Then we did end up pregnat. YEAH! and 8 weeks later we miscarried. This was my first one and it was devastating. I took it very hard and knew it was something I had done wrong at some point in my life. It took me sometime to go move on and try again. Only to get pregnant again and miscarry again...this time after seeing the heartbeat which I understood was rare. But it happens. Both times we miscarried was under 12 weeks and it is very common just not talked about alot.

So, Bob and I moved on. I feeling like a failure and that my body was turning against me. I started believing that Greyson would be my only child and I felt so sad. Bob couldn't fix this one and it was hard on him. Because we were young and didn't have a full history of miscarriages there wasn't much to do yet. We just kept trying.

We got pregnant again and I was the world's biggest basket case. I was so worried to do anything because I thought I'd miscarry again. I knew in my heart that there was nothing I could do but my head wasn't so sure. We made it past 12 weeks and all the way up to 38 weeks! Every step of the way I was worried and just knew something was going to happen but we finally had our sweet little Natalie in 2001!

It really wasn't that long of a time but when you are in the midst of everything it feels like an eternity! Now it just seems like life. We joke with Natalie that she was our slowest child. Took as a long time to get pregnant with her and then even her labor was the longest of the 3 kids. We nicknamed her slow poke Sally in Kindergarten because she was always the last one out of school and just took her time. She still does. It's part of Natalie and I love it.

She has taught me so much but the best thing she taught me is that all good things come in time. Not always on my schedule and not always when I want it but when the time is right. My life would not be the same without her and at exactly the time she came to us. She is my best reminder to be patient. That I may not know the reasons why things happen but I will be glad in the long term.  Now she is teaching me more patience and more understanding. My life really wouldn't be the same without her.

The force in Taiwan

We are all a big lover of Star Wars in the house. We use little references every now and then from the movies, Jake was a storm trooper for halloween twice and I have a long standing crush on Anakin right before he becomes Darth Vader. See how much we love it?

So over Christmas break whenever Greyson wanted something done he'd tell either Jake or Natalie that they should "go, fulfill your destiny" sometimes he'd call them little padawans, you know the name for the young Jedi's in training. Jake and Natalie just ate this up and LOVED it! They ended up doing so many things for Greyson it was ridiculous.

One day we are walking out of an elevator and Natalie beats Greyson to the usual saying and says....Go, Greyson fulfill your destiny little Taiwan! So it's become a great family joke and we all aim to be little Taiwans.

Moral dilemma

I'm embellishing here a little but not too much! So, if this conversation happened in your house how would you react?
Wife: My house needs cleaned.
Husband: The house is always a mess  you need to clean better.
Wife: Look of frustration but ignores comment
Husband: Look, let me help you out. I'll clean and get it all looking good and all you have to do is maintain.

Would your husband still have his life? This wife runs a successful daycare and has 5 children of her own! Seriously, MAINTAIN?

Struggles

Singapore has brought us alot of struggles. It's not all beaches and margaritas unfortunatley. One of my biggest struggles has been my relationship with my kids. It changed just a little and not for the better!
I use to be someone who LOVED having their kids around even when they did get on my nerves. I was just greatful to have them around. I LOVED spending time with them, especially since they started going to school and my time with them is few and far between. I think I lived more for breaks and summer vacation than they did! And I cried every single first day of school. As other mothers were rejoicing I was sitting at home nursing my broken heart. I missed their fights and their whining. Not every day was roses but I genuinly loved spending time with my kids. Somedays we'd never talk to eachother but I heard the things they were doing and it made my heart glow.
Then, we moved to Singapore....cue bad, scary music.

I really could not stand to be around them. I counted the days before they went back to school. I rejoiced every Monday morning and dreaded every Monday night. I HAVE NEVER BEEN THAT MOM! It scared me. I was ashamed of myself  for not enjoying my kids. Every night was a struggle just to get to bedtime and every morning was a struggle just to get to school. I found nothing to be proud of, when I use to find anything no matter how small! I struggled, they struggled.
I thought Thanksgiving break would be good for us and get us back to normal. I didn't schedule anything but family time. Games and dinners...together. We ALL needed to rebond. It sucked. We all wanted our own thing in our own time and we wanted it NOW! We had forgot how to be a family and it made me so sad.  I really do pride myself on how awesome my family usually is. I started thinking that this move is going to be the undoing of my family. I was really at a crossroads. My kids were hurting and I needed to do something.
SO, I started talking to the kids about how it's okay to miss friends or the states. I got out a few times, made new friends and encouraged the kids to do the same and let them know they weren't being traitors to their other friends. We all talked about how different it is here and were amazed at how some of our struggles were all the same. Granted they still got on my nerves and somedays I had to reach hard to enjoy them, but reach I did. And I felt like we were getting back on track.
And then Christmas break started approaching and I got scared. What if this break is as sucky as the last? Will it hurt all the progress we've made? Can we just skip break?
B  U  T..
I am glad to say that it was great! We have enjoyed eachother again. We've grown together and struggled together and that's what families do. I haven't done anything I should have over break and I've let so many other things slide. We've explored parts of Singapore together and cheered eachother on as we tried new things. IT HAS BEEN GREAT! my heart is singing again. They've argued and fought me and whined but in the more normal way. The way that I expect and know how to deal with. That is my best Christmas present.

Toot, Toot, Toot!

I'm going to be tooting the horn of one of my most adorable friends here today. She is way too busy making things like this...

and like this.....

 to toot her own horn.  Oh, and making me chocolate goodbye parties that look like this....

She is da' bomb diggity of all bomb diggities! SO it is up to me as her most adorable friend! I dedicate my 200th post to you Canesa!

She is a great party planner! Not only was mine AWESOME she has done a full Candyland theme for her oldest daughter's FIRST birthday! All the way down to a life sized map! Seriously, Canesa post the picture in the comments! Canesa doesn't just do a fruit bowl, no, she makes the WHOLE dang bowl and then bedazzles it and then decorates the fruit with sparkles. Okay, that may be overboard but take my word for it, she knows how to entertain! She also makes it look effortless. I'm the one who puts the bowl on the table and forgets the fruit and then has to lay down from all the hard work!

She just found her magnificent talent in woodworking. I think  her husband is a little jealous of her talents because he "grounded" her from making more for awhile. Jealous much Burt? LOL! And her first project was this.....

Made totally from scratch, except for the bedding! She didn't work herself up to it, she started with this HUGE project! I hear she did 28 other little projects for Christmas. I'm sure she built someone a house and is just too humble to say so!

She is my favorite decorator. Not only did she do this room, while her husband was

hunting .......

she also helped me do this room of mine...........

she was also a great consultant on other rooms in my Utah house, while my husband was gone for work. I've missed her much here in Singapore. Funny thing is she was always over at my house helping me decorate that her husband joked that her and I were married. Haha Burt, I'd totally marry her! She redoes a room in her house at least once a month! And it always looks amazing! And not only does she re-do a room but the rest of her house is spotless along with a homemade dinner, I think she is secretly

She-ra princess of power!

Have I mentioned that she is also an athlete? She has trained and ran in a triathlon, all while her 3rd child was a baby. Seriously, she found the time and did it while always looking like a goddess! And while she was training for this triathlon she also did some major biking like miles and miles of biking! I watched her kids because I'm seriously allergic to exercise. Canesa pushed herself and learned to swim during her triathlon training. Just goes to show that you can always learn something new! I love her determination.

But I think her best accomplishment is the 4 beautiful and happy kids that she is raising. And three of those kids are under 4 with one of them being almost 1! She has done this all with 3 kids at home and one a pre-teen. AND she does it with a smile and a hug and she totally loves it! Along with her immaculately kept home and home made dinners that are fantastic.

I sit here crying because I miss her. I miss her silly stories and calling me when she finds a birds nest on her door, I miss just knowing she is a hop, skip and jump away. I miss our wild shoe buying escapades. This post has been hard for me to write but Canesa, I love you. I hope this ends your year with a bang. I'm sorry I didn't get that fruitcake over to you this year. LOL. I'm so proud that you continue to be my friend when I continue to desert you for a silly job or moving across the world.

Fra ra ra ra rah rah rah rah rah....

That is my favorite line from A Christmas Story. Especially now that we are here in Singapore with Asians and we've had the duck here and it actually does come with the head attached! Plus, it reminds me just a little of my American home.

Our first Christmas in Singapore has been celebrated, toys have been played with and broken and before we can get the lights out of the trees our kids have begun the gimmes AGAIN! They're my kids all the way! It's good to want as long as they know they aren't getting everything!

Of course the kids were spoiled and got too much stuff and so did I. I got both Jewelry AND a kindle. I also got one of the cutest Santa's ever to celebrate our first Christmas here.

Not much really seemed different except that we all were wearing shorts and t-shirts instead of warm and fuzzy jammies. The groundskeeper was sweeping the dead leaves which gave a nice background noise, and made my kids sad that he wasn't celebrating like us. Instead of snow gear the kids got swimming gear. Still chuckle over that one. It just feels weird to go swimming in DECEMBER and OUTSIDE! Not that I'm complaining.

The kids played with the Chinese neighbors next door for quite a while after opening presents. My most memorable quote will be the Chinese girl asking me "can I just ask you one question? did all of this cost you a fortune?" Yes, Chloe it did. And I"m a little ashamed of it, but probably do the same thing next year. I always do. The neighbors only get one present, one fairly expensive present but as Chloe told me..."I don't spend all my money, and my pocket change is growing". Maybe she can teach me.

I think it wa a success. NO one said they missed anything or wished we would still be in the States. We all enjoyed the day playing our new family games and eating too much candy. My favorite times are the times we all spend together, reconnecting and learning about eachother. It really was just another Christmas to us no matter where we are in the world. Hope all of yours was wondorous too.

Love

This is me and my LOVE. With his love for me I have acheived things I never thought possible. This picture says so many things. It's a date night with my hubby here in Singapore in December. I look forward to my time alone with Bob. When life gets busy I sometimes forget that I really love his personality and just being with him. It's nice to go out and enjoy eachother and nourish the love that has kept us going for the last 18 years. With our love for eachother we have acheived both PEACE and JOY. 

Peace

All 3 of my kids quietly reading books and listening to my new Christmas music of Rodrigo Rodriquez. It was very peaceful! ONe of my favorite days.

Joy

Yesterday I went to a church luncheon with some new found friends, Andrea and Jennifer.That's us on the side, aren't we cute?

Since this was a Christmas type of lunch the talk was about what brings you Joy. There are many things in my life that make me happy and even more things that I like. But things that truly bring me that unadulterated JOY? I had to think about that one. Of course I started thinking about big and grand things like walks on the beach, expensive vacations and the expensive hair and clothes to go along with it.  As I continued throughout the night to think my most joyous moments are those that were small or are the little comforts of life. Here are some of the things that bring me Joy.

*Brand new socks on a cold night
*My kids laughing and just goofing off with them
*My husbands mischievous grin
*Finding an old friend
*Making a new friend
*Lazy time
*Accepting who you are
*Acquiring a new skill
*Swimming
*Music
*Snuggling, especially with the whole family

*Knowing that God created my husband just for me!

*Letting go of past hurts

*Finding something you thought was lost

*Getting lost in a good book or good movie

*Family game time

*Being needed by someone who isn't your child

*Making a difference in someones life

Joy to me are those things that I crave or look forward to. The things I want to create when I am down or need a good old pick me up. Like I said there are many things that make me happy but these are just some of the things that make me really enjoy my life. And this list would not be complete without adding one from the luncheon: Freshly cleaned sheets and cleanly shaved legs. That is very nice!

What brings you joy?