Let me start with my disclaimer: I love my husband and kids. I even think I love the dog that pees everywhere in my house. I even love my stay at home mom job. I really do. BUT I AM SICK AND TIRED OF DOING EVERYTHING WITHOUT A SIMPLE THANKS. My family is taking me for granted and somehow this has become my fault. AH, no, wrong answer! I'm done, as of today.
I don't get paid for my job as a mom and that's fine but all I have ever asked for was a little respect here and there along with a few thanks and congratulations. But the last 6 months are CRAZY!! I feel like I'm just some dumb dog chasing her tail around. I clean, they mess up. I start nagging, nothing! I yell and then maybe they might just clean a little after throwing a fit or they stop cleaning because something else came up. Then I feel guilty for nagging. I want to do fun and inspiring things with my kids but when all I do is clean and cook and laundry where is the time to do all that?
Let me tell you where, it comes from me going bonkers and never feeling caught up. I try and make time for everything everyone wants to do and most days I succeed at the cost of my sanity and just a few special moments of my own time. Time that I need and crave. And then sometimes I don't even enjoy the time we do have together, I HATE THAT!! What I get in return is a bad attitude and my kids (and sometimes my husband) somehow thinking that everything they want or need is done by magic. I am not a well of eternal giving and cleaning up after. I need to be replenished every now and again. Call me needy but I do. And to my dear husband, sex does not always recharge me--sorry to break it to you.
I don't like continually yelling, I'm a person and not a broken record. They don't listen, they don't seem to care because they are right. I will get tired of looking at the mess and end up doing it myself. Maybe it is my fault and I really have tried to get things better. This strike is not my first idea. I have relaxed my standards, I have allowed messes for a few days, I've tried to be funny, I have talked to all family members about how I just need a "good job mom" or an "I really appreciate what you do", I've used bribes (incentive programs), I've told them we can do MORE fun things if only they helped BUT NO ONE IS LISTENING. Not only am I a broken record but my speakers must be broken also. And I can't even put it on my to do list because I can't find the time. ACCCKK!!!
As I sit here my whole family is cleaning. In all honesty--just between you and I-- I'd gladly clean the whole house by myself if I just felt that they appreciated me a little bit more. That what I do matters to them. But I'm not really happy and I actually feel somewhat guilty. Guilt is a mom's best friend. I know they are only cleaning because I threw a fit and said the word strike. (Thank you spongebob for teaching the kids something of value).
Anyone else feel this way? What would you do? Have I finally gone over the deep end? Maybe I should just check myself into an insane asylum. I need the rest.
And do you know what else is going to happen? Seriously do you? I'll have to be the one to come up with the "new" chore list and make sure that they all have them done. Does that sound fun? Does it sound fair? I truly am the CEO of my home, all rules and regulations are made and enforced by me. I should fire them all but I am truly in love with every single one of those hooligans and the sex starved maniac in my life.
What's a girl to do? Give me your answers or just commiserate with me. I need it.
P.S. This article is not about me but it says so much.